September's End

September marks a month of change. The weather changes with the start of fall. Students go back to school and go back to their normal schedules. I had already been teaching the majority of my students for a month, but they started Chinese school. I started my normal teaching schedule. In school, we have been doing less ice breakers and routines and have been starting to rigorously dig into the curriculum. Even with the changes, I have been able to develop some routines. One of the routines is Fried Chicken Monday (FCM), where some of the other teachers and I get fried chicken and watch TV. Both inside and outside of school it was an incredibly busy month. We had a four-day weekend, where Josilin and I took a day trip to Taipei. There were three typhoons with two typhoon days. I also finally got a scooter and my Alien Resident Card (ARC).  Here is a look at some of the things that I did this month.

Click on the picture to get a better view and to be able to read it better. 

Honeymoon's Over

This past week I found myself facing several frustrations (listed below) that made it clear that there are some challenges with living in a foreign country. Here are some of the realities I faced this week. I fully realize that these are very much first world problems.

1. First, my bank issued new debit cards with chips in them. They sent mine to my former address, even though I had given them my parent's address as a forwarding address. They cancelled all the old debit cards, so I no longer have a working debit card. I just got paid, so I have money. It is annoying that I am without one. I will need it by the time I go to South Korea in less than a month. My parents are planning on mailing it to me when they get back from vacation. 
2. My schedule at work changed in September. Since the students have started Chinese school, I see them afterward. This means I go into work a lot later and get done at 7:00 pm. I am someone who wakes up early, so this has been an adjustment for me. I would rather go into work earlier and get done earlier. At times it feels like I am just waiting around until work. I am still figuring out things to do here during the day and how to productively use my time. Also, see below. 
3. In August, I would ride my bike to work when it wasn't raining. With my change in schedule, by the time I get off work it is rush hour and dark. So I have been taking the bus and getting rides from people. The buses do not seem to run as frequently at night and it takes me a lot longer to get home because of rush hour.  On two occasions, I have waited about 40 minutes for a bus. This happens at night when I am tired from work and just want to get home and eat dinner. At this point it is really convenient not having a scooter. 

These things are all pretty small. Together though, they made me a little cranky, a little bummed, and a little irritable the past week. It made me realize that sadly my honeymoon in Taiwan is over. When I first came to Taiwan, one of the administrators said that we would eventually come down from the high of being here. I kind of shrugged it off. Now I completely understand. Everything is not shiny, bright, and new. I am not just on vacation. I am living in a foreign country and there are definitely aspects of my life that are more difficult abroad. 

Leslie Knope asks her constituents, "Are you better off than a year ago?" 

To get some perspective, I turned to the wonderful Leslie Knope. After her first year as a city councilwoman, she faced being recalled. She asked her constituents,"are you better off than a year ago?" This is a question that I posed to myself too. Am I better off than I was a year ago? Absolutely. At this time last year, I was working as a long-term substitute in a school that I would dread going to each day. I was working with people that I did not particularly care for. Here I am still enjoying my job, I am surrounded by wonderful people, and I get to experience living in a wonderful country. I recognize that I am very privliged to be able to do these things. Also, many of my frustrations are small and very fixable. The debit card will get sent to me. I can research more what to do during the day and spend more time developing good writing habits. I can inquire more about scooters that are for sale, instead of waiting for one to magically appear. 

An event this weekend also gave me some perspective. We had a four-day weekend and were originally going to go down south to go to a yacht party. The party ending up getting cancelled because there were not one, but two typhoons. So instead of going south, my roommate and I took a day trip to Taipei (more on this later). As we were taking the bus back, we both were pretty wiped out. I mentioned that I would probably go to bed almost right away after getting home. We had not been gone long, but I still looked forward to returning home. Without even thinking about it, I called Taiwan home.  Even though my honeymoon period is over with living in Taiwan, calling Taiwan home is better than the honeymoon, vacation stage. 

Since this post is kind of a bummer, I want to end on a positive note. Here are a couple of recommendations of things I watched, listened to, read, and did this week that made me happy. 

Watch/Listen: 
The music video for the song "Soy Yo" by Bomba Estéreo. The song itself is very catchy and features interludes of recorder. The music video makes me love this song even more. It shows a Latina girl shutting down various haters throughout her city. I have watched it on repeat this week, as did my friends after I played it for them. 

Listen:
I recently took a four hour walk and binged on this podcast. The podcast is put on by two long-distance best friends who talk about the news, feminism, and what it is like to be a woman today. There have been so many moments while listening that I found myself thinking, "this is something other women experience too?"  
http://www.callyourgirlfriend.com/episodes

Read: 
Neil Gaiman's 2012 Keynote to the University of the Arts
This is something that I reread every couple of months. Neil Gaiman always gives fantastic advice and wisdom. His speech here focuses on the importance of making good art no matter what is happening in your life.  
http://www.uarts.edu/neil-gaiman-keynote-address-2012

Do: 
The workout videos from the Fitness Marshall's YouTube Channel. He does dance workouts to current pop hits. My friend Tyler introduced me to the channel and we have done the workouts a couple of times this week. Dancing it out really helped my mood this week. My favorite is to Justin Bieber's "Cold Water," which is below. 

Talk to Strangers

When I was little, we watched a video called "Too Smart For Strangers" in school. The video featured people in creepy costumes of Winnie the Pooh characters talking and singing about what to do if a stranger approaches you. I really enjoyed this video and found it very informative. Later that day when my family went to the movie rental place, I saw the video and even asked my parents if we could get rent it. My parents rightfully said no, because it is a very odd thing for a six-year-old to want to watch. Even with only one viewing, I understood the message of the video loud and clear. Strangers are bad people who want to do bad things to you.

Here is the video cover of "Too Smart for Strangers" for your convenience. 

In middle school, my friend Sarah was the first person to show me how not only how to talk to strangers, but also how to have a meaningful conversation with a stranger. She would ask a waiter what they liked to do in their free time or ask a lifeguard at Wisconsin Dells what it was like to work there. Remarkably, even though we were strangers to them too these strangers would share very personal stories with us.These were strangers, and yet when we talked to them they didn't seem dangerous.  I started becoming less afraid to talk to strangers, and not just talking to them but asking them personal questions about their lives. As an introvert, frequently it is even easier talking to strangers, because there is less risk. These conversations are fleeting, but also very valuable. 

Kio Stark recently gave a TED Talk called, "Why You Should Talk to Strangers." (https://www.ted.com/talks/kio_stark_why_you_should_talk_to_strangers?language=en). In it she says, 

" . . . in many parts of the world, we're raised to believe that strangers are dangerous by default, that we can't trust them, that they might hurt us. But most strangers aren't dangerous. We're uneasy around them because we have no context. We don't know what their intentions are. So instead of using our perceptions and making choices, we rely on the category of 'stranger.'"

This was definitely me and I am so glad that I can usually muster up some courage to talk to strangers, because it makes travelling and living in a different country so much more enjoyable. Living abroad it is near impossible not to talk to strangers. Frequently, I will get asked where I am from and what I am doing in Taiwan. People are curious as to what I am doing in Taiwan and what I think about this country. I have also needed to start conversations to ask for help and also just out of curiosity about the lives of others. There are two main benefits that I get from my conversations with strangers that Stark also addresses in her TED Talk. 

The first benefit is that these conversations makes me feel like I am a part of a community. My roommate Josilin, who has been here for two years, can't go anywhere without running into a "friend." Timothy at Family Mart always seems excited when he sees me. There is a cook at a restaurant I frequent, who speaks limited English, but she still smiles and waves at me when I come in. Our relationship is not just a business transaction. She recognizes me; she sees me. 

Talking to strangers also makes me aware of my own bias. When I was younger, I put everyone in the category of stranger or friend. Now I know that strangers are not necessarily dangerous. My brain still puts strangers into categories, which is biased. Stark writes,

"When you think about it, using perception instead of categories is much easier said than done. Categories are something our brains use. When it comes to people, it's sort of a shortcut for learning about them. We see male, female, young, old, black, brown, white, stranger, friend, and we use the information in that box. It's quick, it's easy, and it's a road to bias. And it means we're not thinking about people as individual." 

Here it is easy to put people into two categories: foreigner and non-foreigner. My brain puts people into these two categories mostly based on skin color. This shows my bias. I have met people who were Asian, that I falsely assumed were from Taiwan who ended up being foreigners.  I have also heard that some schools here will not hire foreign teachers if they are Asian because upon first glance it is not clear whether or not they are foreigners. Another bias I have recognized while being here is that because I work with mostly American teachers, my first inclination is also to assume that every white person I see is American. As I have started conversations, I have met white people from South Africa, Canada, and various parts of Europe. Now that I am aware of these biases, I can work to fix them. When I put people in these categories, I am not seeing them as individuals. After having a conversation with them, I see others not as a foreigner or a local, but as Jimmy from California who knows a lot about world capitals. I made a connection with my Uber driver, who had visited Minnesota to go to the 3M headquarters. In a world where there is so much rampant and blatant xenophobia and racism, it is a start to have a simple conversation with a stranger to see others as an individual and not a category. 

Admittedly, it is easier for me to talk to strangers in a different country or while traveling. In the United States, I am far less bold. Different countries have various unspoken norms when it comes to friendliness with strangers. In Denmark, people would rather miss their stop on the train than ask someone to move out of their way so they can get off. Taiwan was just rated the best place to make friends (http://indy100.independent.co.uk/article/the-best-and-worst-countries-in-the-world-for-making-friends--WkbWdgjoXdZ). People are very friendly to foreigners. However, one of the Taiwanese teachers at my school told me that it is very un-Taiwanese-like to strike up a conversation with another Taiwanese person in public. People stick to their social hubs of family, school, and work to make friends. It takes a shift in thinking about how we see others. For me it took a shift in thinking with what I was taught in school at a young age in regards to strangers. 

The ability not to default strangers as dangerous starts with children. By only giving children the categories of stranger and friend, it does society a disservice. It is important to teach children that some strangers do not have the best intentions, but not all strangers are bad by default. The recent news cycle of Jacob Wetterling's body being found in Minnesota (http://www.startribune.com/danny-heinrich-confesses-to-abducting-and-killing-jacob-wetterling/392438361/) and the story of clowns trying to luring kids into the woods are just two examples of strangers not having the best intentions (http://www.cbsnews.com/news/clown-sightings-reports-of-clowns-luring-kids-expand-into-second-state-south-carolina-north-carolina/). Instead of teaching that all strangers are dangerous by default like I learned with "Too Smart For Strangers," teach kids how to use their perceptions instead of categories to know when it is okay to be friendly and when it is not. Everyone you know was a stranger at one point in time, so go out and talk to a stranger!  

Snapshots from Taiwan

I have not written a blog post in a while. The reason for this is that I have been rather busy the past two weeks. Like any teacher at the start of school, I have stayed late during the week to plan and finish setting up my classroom. Outside of teaching, I have also been busy spending time getting to know the other teachers at my school. I have lived in Taiwan for two months now and it is clear that there is a difference between visiting a country for a vacation and living there for an extended period of time. While I feel like I should constantly be exploring and taking advantage of my time here, I also have to do mundane day-to-day routines like I would in the states. I still need to take time to work out, pay bills, and wash the dishes. I feel the need to explore, but also the need to make sure I get everything I need to done. I'm still figuring out how to balance both. Here are some snapshots from the past couple of weeks of my time here.

Ghost Month

One day I was modeling how to read to someone and sit EEKK (elbow elbow knee to knee) style. I told my student that was helping me how we were going to sit. 

      "Teacher," he said, "you cannot. It is Ghost Month." 

What he was talking about is that every year around August, it is believed that the gates to the underworld open and lets spirits visit the living for a month. During this time people will set out food for the ghosts and burn yellow paper "money" for the ghosts. There are many practices and rules during this month. Some of these rules include: 

1. Don't turn around if someone taps you on the shoulder. (What the student thought I was going to do)
2. Don't hang your clothes out at night. 
3. Don't go swimming, especially in the ocean. 
4. Don't whistle, especially at night. 

I am sure I broke several taboos during ghost month, including swimming. I ain't afraid of no ghosts. However, one day when I was swimming laps at the pool in my apartment, something a little creepy happened. There was a dad and several small children swimming in the pool at my apartment at the same time as me. Everyone got out of the pool, except for this one boy. I was kicking and keeping an eye on him. Where were his grownups? He was walking around the pool and looking at the bottom like he had dropped something and couldn't find it. He would dive down to the bottom and then come back up. He did this several times. I looked away for a second and he was gone. Worried that he was drowning, I went over to where he had been, but there was no trace of him. I told the story to my students, which led to a divided discussion of whether or not he was a ghost. They still ask me if I have seen him while swimming. 

Food and Friends

This is from a couple of weeks ago when I went out to dinner at a traditional Taiwanese restaurant with some of the other teachers at our school (Marcie, Josilin, and Jill). Afterwards we had ice cream. 

When I went to college on the West Coast, I loved getting bubble tea. I had no idea that it was invented in Taiwan. Here is bubble tea from the original bubble tea house. 

Exploring Taichung

Admittedly, I have not even made a dent in exploring Taichung. My roommate is a great tour guide and is willing to take me to all the sights. The picture above is from Rainbow Village. The story behind Rainbow Village is that a neighborhood was going to be torn down and redeveloped. Rainbow Grandpa, as he is now called, painted all of the buildings to try to prevent it from being redeveloped. It is still standing and attracts many visitors. 

This is one of the many markets in Taichung. This one specializes in selling jade, but also sells other goods. While at this market we visited a tea seller, who took the time to brew tea for us. 

Puli

Embarrassingly enough, I had  yet to venture outside of Taichung. So this weekend when my friend Tyler invited me to go on a day trip to a farm, I jumped at the chance. Originally we were going to take a car and then the morning of it was decided that we were going to scoot. Tyler doubled me with our friend Michael leading the way. Michael said that he knew a longer, but more scenic route. The more scenic route led us through the mountains. Tyler's scooter does not have great brakes, so every time we went downhill it was a little scary. When we stopped at an overlook Michael asked if we had enjoyed the view. Tyler and I mentioned that we didn't notice much of the view because we were afraid we were going to drive off the mountain. After three hours of scooting, we arrived at the city of Puli and convinced Michael to stop and spend the day there. We went to the local information center and got recommendations for what to see. The first stop was a paper making plant. We went on a tour (in Chinese) and then printed on our own paper. It was interested to see the process of how it was done from pulp to paper. The above picture is two of the workers at the plant turning the paper we made into a fan. 

We also went to a chocolate shop, a brewery, and a park. In Taiwan, I have found that things are often not what you would expect them to be (see my last post). They had recommended that we go to King Garden at the information center. In my mind I picture a garden with flowers, plants, and as a place to enjoy nature. Silly me! The "garden" was actually a castle with shops inside, a giant chessboard, and cardboard cutouts of world leaders as characters in movies. The cutouts included Hitler as Kill Bill and Hillary and Bill Clinton as Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I mentioned to Tyler, Michael, and Jacob that it wasn't what I expected from a garden. They told me that this is Taiwan and I better get used to it. :)

16 Things That Mean Something Different in Taiwan

My transition to living in Taiwan has been fairly easy. That is not to say that there have not been some adjustments. Here are sixteen things that mean something different in Taiwan.

1. scooter

United States: Maybe this is because I am child of the 90s, but I always picture children on Razor scooters. 

Taiwan: If you saw my last post, you know scooting is very different in Taiwan. A scooter is like a Vespa and is the preferred way to transport adults, children, dogs, and IKEA furniture, frequently all at the same time.

 2. doctor

United States: Something that is done occasionally for more serious ailments, because going to the doctor is expensive. 

Taiwan: Something that is done for every ailment, because it is cheap. This past week I had a cold and I was asked if I had gone to the doctor yet. 

3. garbage day

United States: People pay money to have garbage trucks come to your house and pick up the trash on a certain day of the week. 

Taiwan: Garbage day is almost every day. Trucks come around playing classical music (that sounds deceptively like ice cream truck music) and people bring their garbage to the truck. The Taiwan picture is from this past week by my apartment. 

4. tissue

United States: What you use to blow your nose with. 

Taiwan: Frequently interchangeable with napkins, tissue, and toilet paper.

5. mask

United States: Something that is worn as part of a costume, like on Halloween. 

Taiwan: Something that is worn when one is sick to prevent others from getting sick. Also, masks can be worn while scooting to avoid exhaust fumes.

6. nap

United States: Something that is done by small children almost daily and by adults on occasion. I rejected this idea in preschool and would practice tying knots in my shoes instead of sleeping. 

Taiwan: Something that is done on a daily basis by both adults and children. At my school from 12-1 pm every day students pull out cots and have nap time. All students and teachers sleep during this time, because people go to bed later. Pictured are my students' cots in my classroom. 

7. dessert

                       United States: A wide range of sugar-filled choices to be eaten after meals. e.g. cake

Taiwan: A smaller range of less sweet choices that are eaten pretty unfrequently. e.g. sponge cake with fruit. This is a picture of the birthday cake one of my students brought to school. 

8. shower

United States: Something that is usually done daily or after a workout. 

Taiwan: Something that is done 2-3 times a day or after every time you go outside to wash the sweat off.

9. shoes

United States: Typically one pair that is put on for the day. 

Taiwan: Includes street shoes, which are taken off before going inside school, inside shoes, and bathroom shoe varieties. Pictured are bathroom shoes at my school that all the kids share and put on when they go to the bathroom. 

10. 7-11

United States: A gas station known for Slurpees. 

Taiwan: A convenience store known for quick food, ATMs, bill paying, taxi calling, ticket counter, and everything you could possibly ever need.

11. glass of water

United States: A large glass that is cold and usually filled with ice. 

Taiwan: A small glass that is usually lukewarm temperature with no ice. Ice is thought to be unhealthy, as is drinking things that are very cold. 

12. spoon

United States: see picture

Taiwan: see picture

13. swimming

United States: Something that is done in summer outside or indoor for recreational or workout purposes. 

Taiwan: Something that is done outside for two months of the year, because otherwise it is not hot enough. It is done for recreational and workout purposes. For both purposes it involves wearing a swim cap and stretching for about 20-25 minutes before entering the pool.

14. New Year

United States: Celebrated in January and involves staying up until midnight, hats, countdowns, and noise makers. 

Taiwan: Celebrated in end of January/beginning of February and involves closing businesses and travelling to visit family.

15. Eating out/cooking

United States: Eating out is something that is done once in awhile, like on special occasions. Cooking is done most frequently and often involves and oven/stove. 

Taiwan: Eating out is done at least one meal a day. It is less expensive than cooking. Most living spaces do not have an oven, but instead use a toaster oven.

16. cute

United States: An adjective most commonly used to describe children and baby animals. 

Taiwan: "Ke ai" in Chinese.  An adjective used to describe everything. 

Getting Back on the (Metaphorical) Horse

When it gets hot in Minnesota, everyone heads up to the lake for some boating. My family did not have a boat, but we would be invited to go out boating by our friends the Hogans. For us kids, the best part of boating was always going tubing. We would all pile up on inner tubes that were connected to the boat by a rope. We would get pulled along until one of us fell off. There were different hand signals to give the driver. A thumbs up meant go faster and a thumbs down went to slow down. Although there were five of us kids, I was always in charge of doing the hand signals. Even though I was not the youngest. I got this job because while my brother was a daredevil, I was always the most cautious. This is something that has continued for me when there is the potential for bodily harm. I have passed up opportunities to sky dive and bungee jump in my travels because I am not a risk taker when in comes to potential broken bones or injury. 

As previously mentioned, scooting is the preferred method of traveling for people in Taiwan. At first I did not think that I would scoot at all. Drivers are crazy. They very frequently will run red lights. Honking in Taiwan means watch out I'm about to do something stupid and dangerous. Scooters go in between cars and are very close together. I grew up where everyone puts a buffer seat between people when sitting down, gives enough room for Martin Luther/the Holy Ghost to go in-between two people when dancing, and gives at least a car length of space in between cars. There is nothing between you and other people and cars. I was decidedly against it. There was too much risk. Then, I doubled with someone on a scooter and after a couple of times found it not as scary as I first thought. One of the other teachers, Tyler, gave me a scooter lesson in areas that there were no cars. It was fun. I wanted a scooter of my own. 

Doubling with Tyler on my first scooter ride. 

While he went home for the month of July, Tyler let me have his scooter. We rode to school together and then he walked home so that I could drive back on my own. I was a little flustered because I did not fully know the way back home. While I felt that I had decent control when practicing, I suddenly did not feel very balanced or in control. I turned down a street and found that the street I wanted to go on was a one-way in the wrong direction. I went to turn, did not turn tight enough and I ran into the side of a car that was turning the same way. No one was hurt, but the car was scratched. The driver got out of the car and started speaking to me in Chinese. I wasn't sure what to do. I messaged Tyler and my roommate Josilin, who told me to go back to the school to get someone to translate. Thankfully, I still was close to the school so I got one of the Taiwanese staff who came out with me and spoke to the driver. They traded contact information and I agreed to pay to fix the damages. Have I mentioned yet how helpful everyone is in Taiwan? The Taiwanese staff at the school is especially wonderful. I ended up taking a taxi home. I was determined to work my way up to scooting home by the end of the month. 

Marcie, one of the Taiwanese teachers I work with, came to my apartment and showed me how to take the bus. The first week of school went by and I did not scoot at all.I checked once to make sure the scooter was still there. Week two I was determined to actually practice. I went to school on my day off to practice. I struggled with even getting the central kickstand up so I could drive. I practiced in the alley behind the school for about 20 minutes and then I had had enough. I was determined to practice more little by little. Meanwhile, other new teachers already seemed like experts. How come it was so easy for others and not for me?

I'm not the only one who has troubles scooting.

That weekend, the teacher who had helped me with the accident messaged me with an estimate of what the damages would cost. It was expensive, way more than I was expecting for just a scratch. She said she tried to negotiate, but that was as low as they were willing to go. If we did not pay that amount they would go to the police station to fill out an accident report and the damage expenses would be even more expensive. I was incredibly discouraged, vowing that I would just relegate myself to biking or the bus. It was a night when I was tired, hot, and very itchy from bug bites. For the first time in Taiwan I was unhappy. I didn't wish that I was still living in the U.S., but I realized that some things were definitely harder here. I went to bed early, hoping I would wake up with a more positive outlook. 

I Facetimed with my parents and told them the estimate. While they acknowledged that it was not a small amount, they said minor car accidents can cost thousands of dollars. I was just used to things in Taiwan being so cheap. It calmed me down. Still, I did not practice scooting for the whole next week. When I came back from the wedding, I had a slight problem. Tyler would be back on Friday. The scooter was still at school. I needed to find a way to get it home. I was talking to another Teacher Jill, another Taiwanese teacher that I work with. She told me scooting wasn't that hard and that it was just like riding a bicycle. I didn't tell her that my parents didn't teach me how to ride a bike until third grade because they didn't think I was coordinated enough. She told me it would be very inconvenient to be without a scooter, especially when all of the other teachers have one.  Teacher Jill told me that I could come to school on Friday to practice and then I could follow her home. 

Inaccurate portrayal of scooting.  You led me astray Roman Holiday.

I was very nervous on Friday. While on the bus to school though, I saw something wonderful. A woman was riding her scooter with her legs on the sides so that she could put her feet down if she needed to stop. I went to school and tried it. It made scooting much easier and I felt more comfortable. I could stop when I needed to and it helped with my balance. I circled the block a couple of times and then told Teacher Jill I was ready. We went very slowly. So slowly, in fact, that at the stopped light another teacher asked Jill if something was wrong with her scooter. I made it though and it was okay. 

The next day Tyler came back, so I assumed he would want his scooter back right away. Instead we went to breakfast and I again drove the scooter. This time I felt comfortable putting my feet up on the scooter once I got going. I think slowly I will get more and more comfortable on the scooter. Driving felt okay.  I will probably get a scooter eventually, but I am in no rush. As Teacher Marcie says, "In Taiwan, if you don't have a scooter, you don't have your feet." I got teased a little bit for going so slowly. But it reminded me of the quote "stay in your own lane. There is less traffic there." I stayed to the right in mostly my own lane while other passed me by. There was still traffic, but I could go at my own pace. It was also a good reminder that I shouldn't compare myself and get discouraged by the progress of other teacher's scooting. After all, they are in a completely different lane. 

There and Back Again: A Tale of a Friendship

When I was offered a teaching position in Taiwan, I had one potential conflict on my calendar. My friend Sarah's wedding was in July. I was supposed to leave for Taiwan the last week in June. Six months earlier, she had sent me a painted mug asking if I would be a bridesmaid in her wedding. My bridesmaid dress was already hanging up in my closet. As a new teacher, the first two months are considered probationary and leave is not granted. So before signing the contract I did the only thing I could do. I asked if I could have leave to go back for the wedding, because it was never a question of if. It was always a question of what. What do I need to do to be able to attend this wedding?  They allowed me the leave and this past weekend I answered the what by taking an uber, bus, two planes, and a car ride back to Minnesota. It was worth it. 

Sarah, the Glinda to my Elphaba. "I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason. Bringing something we must learn and we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them."

Before I left, some of the other teachers asked me: Whose wedding are your going back for? The implied question was: Who is so important that you are willing to travel half-way around the world to spend just a couple of days for? The answer to both questions was: my best friend Sarah. I met Sarah when I was about 11 years old. We met in the locker room at swim practice for Med-City Aquatics.  We appreciated each other's quirks. We both loved getting mail, so we would write letters back and forth to each other (even though we lived in the same city.) We shared hotel rooms at swim meets, named pennies we found and kept a log of them, and enjoyed crafting together. We have remained close friends despite frequently being geographically far apart. Sarah is one of the most caring and loyal people I know. She always asks about how my family is doing and puts in the effort to keep in contact with friends and family.  Going on trips with her, I learned how to make friends with everyone. She would ask waiters, hotel staff, and random people meaningful questions about their lives. She did it in a way that was non-judgmental and caring. In a way that people immediately opened up and shared personal stories with her. She now uses these same strengths in the field of psychology. 

Gnomeo also attended the wedding. 

It is her loyalty as a friend that made it essential for me to put in the effort to go to her wedding as she married Ben. The wedding was lovely. The room was decorated with beautiful white flowers. The humanist minister who officiated the wedding made the ceremony very personal by adding quotes and anecdotes from Sarah and Ben. Sarah looked especially beautiful. Another wedding guest commented, "Does Sarah know how gorgeous she is? How do I ask that without it coming out weird?" The surf and turf dinner was delicious. Everyone had a great time. 

My friends Herbie, Sarah, and Drew representing Med-City Aquatics. 

As I got on the plane, I had quite a bit of time to reflect over the wedding and my short visit home. What I reflected on most was friendship. I stood up by Sarah's side at the ceremony with her other best friends. (As Mindy Kaling said, "best friend isn't a person, it's a tier.") I talked for a long time with my friend Herbie, who I don't see very often (another swim friend). I caught up with some others that were also at the wedding. Those invited were in all stages of friendship with the bride and groom. There were friends that the bride and groom had known since they were very little. Both the best man and the maid of honor were childhood friends.  Then, there were friendships that were relatively new. How many people do we meet in a lifetime? How many of those people do we see once and never again? There are friends that I have made by proximity or because we had a commonality. Some of these friends have eventually slipped away once these things are gone. Still others I have managed to hold onto despite distance and busy lives. It is a rare and special gift to find a true friend. That is a friendship worth traveling across the world for and holding onto tight. 

The bride and groom sharing their first dance. 

 So, I give my best wishes to Ben and Sarah! My hope for you is that your friendship, as well as your love for each other, continues to grow daily.